Read me!!!!!?

Ok so here is a poem I wrote for school. It needs commas and stuff like that also any tips to make it better would help a lot! Here's the poem . . .



Cinnamon is hot like the

wood resting in the

fire preparing itself

for the biggest blizzard in years.



Cinnamon is sweet like the feeling

you get after receiving

freshly picked flowers whose previous

home was your very own backyard.



Cinnamon and cider

is the reward for

raking what seems like

an endless pile of leaves

or sledding down the snow

covered hill, screaming

without a care in the world.

Read me!!!!!?
Just my opinion:



I think that your third stanza is a little weak because it doesn't seem to fit with the other two. The first two are good analogies of Cinnamon. The last one just tells you about "what seems like a pile of leaves" and breaks the flow you have with cinnamon.



Also, what if you tried not using the word "like"? The lines might be stronger for example if you wrote,"Cinnamon is hot wood resting inthe fire..."and "Cinnamon is the sweet feeling..." etc.



Lastly, poems generally don't need commas and punctiation unless it is for a specific purpose to the poem. You don't need to follow standard writing conventions( no commas for commas sake)



Again, Just my opinion and preference.
Reply:Here's teh problem: writing can be fixed to create the story.



Poetry is more personal, so it is hard for me to say this or that or the other.



Unless I can see that you are forcing the poem into a rhyming scheme (and you are not) then it can stand
Reply:I Love It. Wouldn't change a thing.



(One nit - wood doesn't actually "prepare itself" for anything. maybe just change to "...fire, ready for...")